In my last post I mentioned going to fireworks. So I wanted to do a separate post with some thoughts about that experience.
On Saturday night I decided I wanted John to go with me to the concert and fireworks. I was tired of going by myself. I asked him to go knowing full well how awful fireworks are for him. I asked him knowing that he might get a little crazy. I guess you can say I was being selfish. I was tired of giving up the things I want to do just because my husband cannot handle doing these things with me. So I convinced him it wouldn't be so bad and that he should try putting ear plugs in and then the sound wouldn't bother him so much. Ha, I think we both knew better. But he gave in because he knew I wanted him to go with me. He was willing to sacrifice his sanity for my happiness.
So we traipsed off to the concert, stayed for the fireworks, and came home. By the time we got home John was shaking uncontrollably. He could not keep his hands still. On the way home he was really quiet. I tried to talk to him and he wouldn't respond. He was afraid of coming unglued and he says that wasn't fair to me. So he just stayed quiet.
At that point I felt horrible. I was a horrible wife for even asking him to go with me. I was horrible for being so selfish. I need to be more like my husband. He was willing to sacrifice his sanity for me. But I wasn't willing to sacrifice my own wants once again for him. I have been dealing with this for many years. You would think I would be used to it and would be able to push my own desires back. But for some reason I was unable to be selfless. I could only think of what I wanted.
After the fact I wanted to take it all back. I wanted to go back to the point where I decided I wasn't letting him off the hook once again. I wanted to go back and change what I wanted. But I couldn't change it. We could only try to get past it. We could only do things to mitigate, not prevent, the damage. So when it was time for fireworks again on Monday night, I tagged along with my friend and her family. It turns out her husband doesn't like fireworks. So it was good. John stayed home, did what he could to drown out the booming of the fireworks that were being set off only about two blocks away.
This experience raises a lot of questions for me though. The biggest question, are you ready? Fireworks are supposed to be patriotic. Most fireworks shows I attend are choreographed to patriotic music. You know, songs like "God Bless the USA," "America the Beautiful," and "Coming to America." But why do we do this? Why do we use something to demonstrate our patriotic spirit when the people who have protected our freedoms here cannot enjoy the celebration? Why do we do this to our military men and women? Is there a better way to celebrate, to demonstrate our patriotic spirit? I don't know. As I've said before, I love fireworks. I don't know why I love them. I am amazed at the beauty the fireworks create. But at what cost do we use fireworks to celebrate?
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
We've been keeping busy
This month has been pretty busy and has been full of meltdowns, hard lessons, and of course, lots of laughs.
The first friday in June was the last day of school. We attended my daughter's kindergarten graduation program. And of course, she was so excited to sing, but when it came right down to it, she got whiny and did not want to participate at all! Grrr . . .
Now that school is out, we've had the challenge of keeping the kiddos busy. We have been to the zoo, the park, fireworks, a parade and more.
This past weekend was Taylorsville Dayzz. I have always enjoyed Taylorsville Dayzz. There are concerts, fireworks, a carnival, and a parade. I'm not much into the carnival. I think it is way too overpriced. At $3-$4 per ride, I always think I could use that money in a better place. But I do love parades and I love fireworks. This year, my daughter's soccer league was participating in the parade. That meant that three of us walked in the parade, passed out candy, and fliers. It was kind of fun. We have some good people on the board of directors. (Oh yeah, I'm one of those good people!) I love soccer, I love that my kids have the opportunity to play.
This year they had fireworks for three nights. And yes, I went all three nights. I love, love, love fireworks. There is just something about being at the park, and enjoying the whole ambience of the whole show. It is seeing all the people, listening to the music, and even dealing with the bugs.
We have also been busy with piano lessons. The girls are picking up on the piano quite nicely. I am so grateful for the two ladies who are teaching my girls. They are so patient and work with them very well. I love seeing my girls start to understand the concepts. I think piano was a good choice for them.
Last week we were able to celebrate with my friend, Desiree, her husband, and her family. Her husband graduated with his Master's degree. Wow. He's worked hard. What an amazing accomplishment. We went to Bouncin' off the Walls in Sandy. It was fun, but I'm not sure I will go there again. The equipment was in serious disrepair. I did not have sufficient upper body strength to get up on top of one of the slides. The foot holds were all ripped out. But we wore out the kids. We came home and they fell asleep almost immediately.
We have also been going to a movie once a week. The theater close to me does a summer movie club. For $5 a person, we get 10 weeks of movies. The movies are all old movies that are already released on DVD, but it is fun to take the kids to the theater and not feel bad about missing a good portion of the movie for potty breaks and a cranky baby! So far we have seen movies such as How to train a dragon, Despicable Me, and Megamind. It has been quite enjoyable.
Despite the fun activities, the kids have not been immune to meltdowns. Amber is concerned about the fairness of everything and she has a fairness radar. Her meltdowns concern the fairness of everything. She is learning some hard lessons. Some of the hardest lessons she is learning are about money management. She doesn't understand why I cannot buy what she wants all the time. She sees her friends getting things all the time. It is a hard thing for an 8 year old to learn. We have thrown their schedule so far off kilter this summer. I have let them stay up, sleep in, we have breakfast late. But hey, sometimes it just needs to be done. They need to be able to let their hair down, so to speak, and enjoy what life has to offer. I have decided that I do not want to micro manage their whole lives. They need to have some guidelines, but they are also learning to make their own choices. I give them options, they make choices, they reap the consequences- good or bad.
In a nutshell, this has been our summer so far. July will be just as busy. I'm looking forward to all the activities that we have planned.
The first friday in June was the last day of school. We attended my daughter's kindergarten graduation program. And of course, she was so excited to sing, but when it came right down to it, she got whiny and did not want to participate at all! Grrr . . .
Now that school is out, we've had the challenge of keeping the kiddos busy. We have been to the zoo, the park, fireworks, a parade and more.
This past weekend was Taylorsville Dayzz. I have always enjoyed Taylorsville Dayzz. There are concerts, fireworks, a carnival, and a parade. I'm not much into the carnival. I think it is way too overpriced. At $3-$4 per ride, I always think I could use that money in a better place. But I do love parades and I love fireworks. This year, my daughter's soccer league was participating in the parade. That meant that three of us walked in the parade, passed out candy, and fliers. It was kind of fun. We have some good people on the board of directors. (Oh yeah, I'm one of those good people!) I love soccer, I love that my kids have the opportunity to play.
This year they had fireworks for three nights. And yes, I went all three nights. I love, love, love fireworks. There is just something about being at the park, and enjoying the whole ambience of the whole show. It is seeing all the people, listening to the music, and even dealing with the bugs.
We have also been busy with piano lessons. The girls are picking up on the piano quite nicely. I am so grateful for the two ladies who are teaching my girls. They are so patient and work with them very well. I love seeing my girls start to understand the concepts. I think piano was a good choice for them.
Last week we were able to celebrate with my friend, Desiree, her husband, and her family. Her husband graduated with his Master's degree. Wow. He's worked hard. What an amazing accomplishment. We went to Bouncin' off the Walls in Sandy. It was fun, but I'm not sure I will go there again. The equipment was in serious disrepair. I did not have sufficient upper body strength to get up on top of one of the slides. The foot holds were all ripped out. But we wore out the kids. We came home and they fell asleep almost immediately.
We have also been going to a movie once a week. The theater close to me does a summer movie club. For $5 a person, we get 10 weeks of movies. The movies are all old movies that are already released on DVD, but it is fun to take the kids to the theater and not feel bad about missing a good portion of the movie for potty breaks and a cranky baby! So far we have seen movies such as How to train a dragon, Despicable Me, and Megamind. It has been quite enjoyable.
Despite the fun activities, the kids have not been immune to meltdowns. Amber is concerned about the fairness of everything and she has a fairness radar. Her meltdowns concern the fairness of everything. She is learning some hard lessons. Some of the hardest lessons she is learning are about money management. She doesn't understand why I cannot buy what she wants all the time. She sees her friends getting things all the time. It is a hard thing for an 8 year old to learn. We have thrown their schedule so far off kilter this summer. I have let them stay up, sleep in, we have breakfast late. But hey, sometimes it just needs to be done. They need to be able to let their hair down, so to speak, and enjoy what life has to offer. I have decided that I do not want to micro manage their whole lives. They need to have some guidelines, but they are also learning to make their own choices. I give them options, they make choices, they reap the consequences- good or bad.
In a nutshell, this has been our summer so far. July will be just as busy. I'm looking forward to all the activities that we have planned.
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