Surgery

I wasn't surprised when Emma started getting strep every four to six weeks. Nor was I surprised when her doctor said to take her tonsils out. So off we went with the task of finding an ENT to take care of her. I found one close by specializing in pediatrics with lots of experience. His credentials sounded good on paper. Then I learned my friend had gone to this same doctor for her son's surgery about a year ago. I felt better about the decision. We met the doctor, scheduled the surgery, and went about our way.

Plan A- John and I will go with Emma on the big day. We will get someone to watch Timothy and take the baby with us. Amber had school so I wasn't worried about her.

Plan A failed. John had a test in class the morning of surgery. So that leaves me by myself to take Emma. Then the hospital said I couldn't take the baby, even if I am nursing him. Yikes. Okay, this really puts a kink in the plan. Then I found out Amber had short day at school. She was getting out about 1:00 p.m.! What in the world? It seemed nothing was going to happen easily.

Plan B- My dad will go with me and Emma. Jaime will watch my boys, and Amber when she gets home. Okay, looks good now.

But wait, Plan B failed. Despite being in college, my sister couldn't figure out how to get herself to class that morning so my dad had to take her in and pick her up. Class started right about the time I was planning to leave my house. Okay, so my dad would meet me at the hospital. Then I realized Jaime was planning on going out of town that day. Oops. I was feeling like I was asking too much for her to watch my kids and get ready to leave town. But I also felt at a loss for options right about then.

Plan C- My dad will meet me at the hospital. So far it looks good. And a miracle- my brother called, said he had the day off work and wondered if we had a babysitter. He was offering. Oh sweet relief. I could relieve Jaime of babysitting duty, especially since Emma's surgery wasn't scheduled until 11:15 a.m. That would have been difficult for Jaime. And as it turns out, this was more of a miracle than I knew at that moment.

So surgery day rolls around. Despite all my best laid plans, I felt we were derailed again. Nothing ever happens according to the strict plan. I was just pulling into the parking lot of the hospital when the nurse called. "Can you come in any earlier?" Um yeah, not a problem here. I'm feeling good about things right about then. Except that was about ten minutes to eleven. By the time we got fully checked in, it was 11:15. So much for being earlier!

Finally Emma was taken to pre op. We were there only a couple of minutes when my sister calls. Yep, you guessed it. She got out of class early and needed a ride home. Seriously, there's a bus. But to each their own, I suppose. My dad stayed with me and Emma until she was taken into the surgery room. But that wasn't until about 1:20. Yep, we had been there for two hours already. Why did they want us there earlier if they weren't going to get us in earlier? I was frustrated because Emma was so bored.

But, I do have a funny story here. We started watching Tom and Jerry. It was just about the only thing on that could possibly entertain a five year old. The nurse came in and stood between Emma and the TV. Emma moved her head so she could see. The nurse tried to talk to Emma, but Emma didn't want to talk. She wanted to watch Tom and Jerry. She was glued to the TV!

So about 1:20 Emma was wheeled into the operating room. My dad and I went to the waiting room where I checked in with the volunteer and my dad left to pick up Kim. 20 minutes later and I was in a consultation room waiting for the doctor. My dad was back just after I got into the consultation room. Luckily I was right by the elevator so he saw where I was.

Surgery went well. The hardest part of it all was seeing Emma come out of the anesthesia. It was awful watching her crying and hurting. And it is hard knowing she was still hooked up to so many things it was not feasible to hold her at that moment. When it was all said and done we didn't get home until about 3:30 p.m.

Five days later- Emma has improved by leaps and bounds. She is eating more regular foods. She is talking more. At first she would only point and grunt when she wanted to talk. Her voice is higher now that she doesn't have all that blockage in her throat. And I have learned that Emma has a high tolerance for pain. I think I knew that before, but she hasn't asked for much pain meds. I haven't forced them on her either. If she complains I will give her some. She is doing amazingly well.

She was playing outside yesterday. This morning she has been teasing everybody. She is starting to feel more like herself. I am so happy to see her take this so well. And so far, she hasn't acted like she's mad at me for putting her through all of this!

Despite the many roads it took us to get everything taken care of, I'm glad it worked out. Someone knows better than I how things should go. Maybe I need to trust him more!

Oh, before I forget. Check out this link if you want to see pics from surgery day!

Purging

I didn't realize it would be so hard. I feel as if I'm losing a part of me. The tangible reminders of my memories are no longer going to take up space in my home. I am purging baby clothes from my girls. Did I mention that this is hard? Am I crazy for crying over baby clothes? I think I'm too sentimental for my own good. I need to turn off my emotions. They're just clothes, right? But to me they represent so much more. As I sorted through the clothes, I relived the special moments. See, I told you I was too sentimental. Yikes.

I'm not done, but so far I have just about 10 boxes/bags of clothes to give away. I will be putting them on the curb tomorrow morning to give to charity. I will probably need John to tie my hands until then so I don't start taking clothes out of those boxes. I need to let them go. I need strength. I am weak in this!

My daughter just walked into her room and exclaimed, "Wow, that is a lot of boxes!" I didn't realize how far I had fallen. I mean I see the boxes and it is a lot, but when Emma is impressed with the amount, wow, I really needed this purging. Okay, I'll stop whining about it now. Wish me luck on getting all of this to the curb tomorrow morning before 10 a.m. I have lots more to go through so I'll sign off now. Once I'm done with this huge purging project I will report on my success or failure! I think I'll share pictures of the junk I'm going to purge from my home! Don't hold me to it though.

Peace and chaos

The house is a mess. There are piles of laundry waiting to be folded and put away. There are also piles that have been folded that have been dumped out of the baskets by children who "need" the baskets to play train. Dishes create mountains in the sink. Miraculously we have a couple of clean dishes in the cupboards. The living room floor is the exhibition hall for school work to be proudly displayed. Books are the pathway from the living room to my bedroom and from my bedroom to the kid's rooms. Books are also the blankets the kids choose to sleep with on occasion. The kitchen counter and the computer desk are the vases for the flower bouquets so lovingly collected by my children. The bathroom contains evidence of science experiments consisting of water, toothpaste, and soap. The walls contain evidence of budding artists.

Yep, this is the chaos that rules my house. I am overwhelmed, running on sheer exhaustion most days. Frustration and diminished levels of patience have been my friends. However, amidst the chaos is the peace. I find a certain peace in knowing my children are home, healthy, and taken care of. I never understood how one could find peace in chaos until I had children. I still don't totally understand how it happens, but when I need peace, it is there.

Most days I don't worry about the mess my house has become -- until the Relief Society president comes over! :) Why, I shouldn't even worry about that! I just have a house that is evidence of life well lived. I think when I die, the Lord won't ask me to account for a clean house. He'll ask me to account for what I taught my children and the time we spent together. I'm not going to stress about hiding our life from those we choose to share it with. Some days the mountains of dishes will disappear. The school work and paths of books may be picked up, only to be replaced by new adventures!

Random stuff from the past couple of weeks

Don't drop the baby. Leave him alone. No. Back away. Give him some room.
Does this sound familiar? I think this is all I say to my kids since we brought the baby home! I'm trying to give them time with the baby, I'm just nervous. They don't all have the softest touch, or the knowledge to give the baby what he needs!

I am grateful for their help most of the time. Get me a diaper, please! Even a 2 1/2 yo can follow this simple direction. Get some clothes for the baby. My 7 yo loves this direction. You wouldn't know she's a girl with her love for clothes!

A 5 yo conversation with another mom: Our baby only drinks milk - from Mommy. Okay, seriously, how much does she really have to tell everyone? Come to find out my 7 yo has told everyone at school all the details about how we got the baby. Okay, so the details from a 7 yo perspective are very different from fact, but . . . she's still talking to people. I just laugh because it is better than being embarrassed!

Okay, so now down to the nitty gritty. The doctors discharged Micah with serious jaundice. We had to take him in for the Bili test for an entire week. Ugh. Having his heel poked was bad enough, but seeing the scars now is so frustrating. His poor heels look like battlefields. The doc ordered the Bili bed and the Bili blanket. Let me just say, Pain in the keister! At the end of the week, doc decided the levels were stable, not going up, not going down. No more Bili tests for the baby!

Despite the challenges with jaundice, Micah has grown so fast. At his two week appointment he exceeded his birth weight by 5 ounces. His face is starting to fill out. He is the cutest baby, but I'm just a little biased in his favor! :)

So, now that I've figured out the whole camera thing and getting pictures off the camera, I thought I better post a link to some pics. Click here to view pictures of Micah's first couple of days! I'll try to post more from the last couple of weeks, but it is slow going for me. I need more time and energy. Forgive me if I'm slow on updates.

The Story- Micah's Day!

It all still feels so surreal. The day we have waited for was finally here. I don't know as if I absolutely believed it would be this early, but hey, I'll take what I get. Thursday morning I started having contractions. But I didn't put much stock into that fact. I had already had a previous trip to the hospital with contractions that quit as soon as they put me in the triage room. Yeah, got sent home that time! So I thought, here we go again. I was so determined that I wasn't going to go to the hospital if I was just having contractions. I was determined that my water would break this time before getting to the hospital! So I went about my day as usual.
My morning: I went to the store, dropped off my wedding ring for cleaning, and then took a nap. By the time I got home from the store I was wiped. And I knew the time was getting closer. Contractions were starting to hurt more and I just had this overall icky feeling.
My afternoon: John was supposed to drop off his ring for cleaning and pick mine up. He didn't. Contractions were closer together, but I still didn't think it would be such a big deal. I still thought I was having a repeat of what we went through last weekend. I did not want to be sent home again. So when John went to school, I thought we still had lots of time.
3:00 rolls around and I am waiting for the kids to get out of school. It was my turn to pick up the carpool kids. At this point I was unsure of how much longer we had because contractions were not letting up. I found myself unable or unwilling to move. Luckily I didn't have to get out of the car to help any of the kids! I got the kids home, stopped at home to get Amber's booster seat (yeah, didn't have it earlier when I picked her up), and then drove to the jewelry store to pick up my newly cleaned and spruced up wedding ring! Ugh, I felt horrible. I told Amber I wasn't feeling well and she needed to help me out. I found myself approaching a red light when contraction hit. I was lucky to get the car stopped. But I made it home. That was about 4:00 p.m.
I got inside and I knew it wasn't going to be much longer but I hoped I could wait until John got out of class at 8 p.m. Yeah, he was at least 1/2 hour away at this point. My worst fear was being realized. John would be at school and it would take too long for him to get home. I sent him a text message that he needed to get home right away. And then everything just happened in a blur.

So John took an hour and a half to get home after I told him he needed to get home. While I was waiting for him, Amber was so helpful. She helped me get a bag packed for the kids since they needed to go to my dad's house for the night! Ummm, that was on my list of things to get done this week. I just hadn't had the time or the real desire to pack a bag. I knew if I packed my kids bag, it would be unpacked real quick when we ran out of clothes for the kids! So Amber was packing the bag and not complaining. Then she gave me a hug and said "I hope you feel better soon, mommy." What a melt my heart moment.

When John got home I told him to take the kids and then come back for me. I really didn't want to be in the car that long. Okay, my dad really only lives down the street from me, so it wasn't a big deal. I was so mad that I let him go to school that afternoon! All I could think about was, this baby is going to come in the car if we don't get there now! And of course, we were in rush hour traffic on Bangerter Highway. The hospital is only 15 minutes away in light traffic. Yeah, it took us half an hour to get there. I could barely get inside, the pain was so awful. Side note: I am a wimp. Pain and me do not mix. I stopped in the hallway and practically yelled at John to just go check me in. I could not move. I did not want to move. The nurses took one look at me and skipped triage altogether. We went right to the delivery room.
Epidural? Oh my yes. I wanted to be brave, but I couldn't. I needed that pain relief to get through this. Plus, I thought it would be a few hours still. An immediate epidural eased the pain and helped me relax a bit. Yay for pain meds. Did I mention that I am a wimp when it comes to pain?
I was admitted at 7 p.m. At 8:04 I delivered a healthy baby boy! He was 8 lbs. 1 oz. and 19 1/2 inches long.
It is still surreal, even after 4 days! We are so happy to have our little boy here.

Another side note here: I haven't figured out the camera yet so I have pictures, but haven't put them on the computer. Hopefully soon. But it really isn't my top priority right now. We'll see how the week goes. Or maybe the next, or the next.

It's about time!

It is about time I add a new post here. I've had a crazy busy month. Top that off with low energy levels and it isn't a good combination most of the time.
However, here's a recap of the busy, busy month!

My birthday was earlier this month! I am prevented from divulging my age for fear of retribution! (Not really, but it sounded good, right?) I spent the morning of my birthday helping out in Emma's preschool class. It was actually quite enjoyable. I planned it that way because it was a short day. Two hours was much easier than three. Besides, it was the last day I needed to fulfill my co-op obligation! Wahoo, I am done! So my husband called the teachers and told them it was my birthday! During circle time the birthday bear sang to me! It was too funny!

That afternoon I spent at the doctor's office with Emma. We got home from preschool and she was so lethargic and not acting like herself. During preschool she hadn't wanted to eat any popcorn. Hmmm, that was unusual. She loves popcorn. I was concerned. I took her in. Um yeah, so Emma had strep. That meant I couldn't make anything real yummy for dinner cause she wouldn't eat it and I didn't want to make her feel bad.

The next day yielded a total meltdown. You see, I usually get angry instead of crying. I hate to cry. It is much easier for me to get mad and then move on. In a few minutes I will be fine! So it was too much. I had a meltdown. I admit, I cried. I told John to go away. I just wanted to be alone. But then I went to see a movie with my cousin. Ahhhh, late night movies. Gotta love them. I was afraid I would fall asleep, but I didn't!

Then the next day I had fun getting pedicures, lunch, and icecream with my sister in law and my cousin. What a sweet balm for my soul. John stayed home with the kids and just let me be gone for however long it took to have fun! Fun, fun, fun. I had the most amazing day.

That next week I was out of town one day for work. Then last week I was out of town for three days for a conference. I wasn't too sad about leaving last week. I went to sunny St. George. Despite being away from my family, I had a good time. I was able to stay with my friend's daughter so I didn't have to pay for a hotel! The best way to go I say. I had such an amazing time with her. Plus she fed me dinner on Friday night! I am grateful she was willing to let me stay with her and her family. I drove home Saturday afternoon with my friend. We had such a good time together. I am grateful for the opportunity we had to get to talk more!

Oh, I almost forgot the dinner I had with Shirley. We haven't seen each other for quite awhile. Unfortunately, part of that is my fault. I bailed on her a few months ago. I had a period where everything seemed hopeless, and I just didn't go out with people. I knew I couldn't keep up an act at that time. I could try to pretend everything was well, but there were already too many cracks. But things are changing here on the home front and I feel much better! I am so grateful for those people who haven't allowed me to give up. Well, dinner and conversation was wonderful. It has been so good to be able to have time with people out of the house!

In a nutshell that has been my month. Craziness reigns still and it won't slow down anytime soon. But life is good right now!

It's nice!

Earlier this morning I took Timothy outside with me to put something in the mailbox. It is such a beautiful day. When I got inside I was telling John that is very nice outside today. Timothy looked at John and said "nice, nice." Then he proceeded to pull down his pants. I guess he relates a nice day outside to not wearing pants! I was laughing too hard to get mad at him.